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danomite81
04-20-2011, 09:39 PM
Do any of you have a wife that not as exited as you about owning and enjoying a boat?

jester
04-20-2011, 10:08 PM
Dang sorry to hear that. Hope you are able to work it out before the weather gets nice out.

viking
04-20-2011, 10:20 PM
major bummer! my wife was not as exited as I (nor will she ever be) when it comes to the boat. But she sure came around after a summer or 2 with the first one and the family time. Also bought her a camper which was her desire so now she's happy and I can really do whatever to the boat as I please. I just don't show her the receipts :)

ian ashton
04-20-2011, 10:34 PM
L doesn't have the desire to boat as much as I do (pretty much daily, rain or shine), but she understands and accepts it. If she didn't, I probably wouldn't have bought all those carats, lol

Ian Brantford
04-20-2011, 10:49 PM
If only there were standard pre-marriage counselling that included this topic. Heck, start earlier in high school "preparation for life" courses.

I am glad that I got into boating before being ready to settle down. I still haven't found "the one", but it's a given that she'll have to be a "boat babe". Some people are averse to having objective checklists regarding their future partners, but for me this issue would be almost as important as having the correct gender.

There is only one way to make an exception: she can be lukewarm on boating IF she has a waterfront cottage near our city and likes lots of guests. That way our weekends would still overlap.

harmsway
04-20-2011, 10:55 PM
That would really suck if the better half didn't like boating. I feel your pain and all I can say is find a way that makes boating enjoyable for her. Even before my wife skied and wakeboard she never did mind going out on the water. Now she is the one saying lets hit the lake after work or lets try to get out there by 6:30 am and I get the 1st run on the glass.

Teach her how to drive, make her feel needed when you are out on the water and find something she likes doing on the water. You have to convence her that boating is great way to create family memories.

I guess a few of are blessed with wives that enjoy it as much as we do. It is an addiction you just have to get her hooked. lol

kaneboats
04-20-2011, 11:01 PM
Do any of you have a wife that is; let's say not as exited as you about owning and enjoying a boat? I have been banned from using the word boat and I am not allowed to even get in , look at or do just about anything that has to do with the B word . This is a hard time for me seeing how I just bought the B at the end of the season last year and did not even look at it this winter. Feel free to vent cause I am!

Start going to the sewing circle or bingo or whatever it is that's important to her. The message is that you are 100% on board with whatever her thing is because she's that important to you. (Leave your part unsaid.)

When I met my wife she would not get in water over her head. Her mother was deathly afraid of water an always told her she would drown. Over time she has grown to appreciate the peacefulness of the water, the time with nature, the healthy family activities, the good friends we spend time with, etc. I would thank her for indulging me and putting up with my hobby but once I had 4 kids hooked there wasn't much choice. Now she truly enjoys the time on the water and was the insitgator in us getting our LSV. If she's the right gal she'll come around.

Razzman
04-20-2011, 11:13 PM
Mine lives for the boat. In fact when we shut the business down two years ago I mentioned we might have to sell the boat, she said "We'll walk away from the house before I sell my boat!". It's still out there :p

jester
04-20-2011, 11:19 PM
Mine lives for the boat. In fact when we shut the business down two years ago I mentioned we might have to sell the boat, she said "We'll walk away from the house before I sell my boat!". It's still out there :p

Does your wife have a sister the same way? You better hold on to that one.

TL7
04-20-2011, 11:40 PM
I'm also one of the lucky ones who has a great "boat" wife. She loves going out as much as I do, whether we're wakeboarding, surfing, or just enjoying a cruise with the hound. She drives better than any of my friends, backs me in at the ramp, and loads the boat on the trailer when we're leaving. You bet I'm bragging - she deserves it!

Replicant
04-20-2011, 11:47 PM
Interesting. I had full support from my wife. We see it as a family thing. And, since we technically live in the desert, a survival issue. Gotta stay cool in the hot, hot sun. Ironically, when I asked the guy I bought my boat from, why he was selling. The first thing he said was that he had not used it in a year and a half. Then he said "also, my wife hates it". Unfathomable.

saskyrider
04-20-2011, 11:55 PM
My wife is not a water bug by any means but we made the decision together to upgrade our boat.... She was more concerned about what the kids thought. Of course they were both for it..... She likes cruising on the water though and if the kids are happy the she's happy. Plus my nephews are nuts for it and their cabin is just a couple away from ours.

scoot_gt
04-20-2011, 11:58 PM
but man I just love to tell her what I am thinkin about .

Easy fix - just don't tell her about it and instead just do it :)

jmvotto
04-21-2011, 12:25 AM
Easy fix - just don't tell her about it and instead just do it :)
If you like sleeping on the couch or for that matter in the boat:p

2007 Outback V
04-21-2011, 12:30 AM
I bet your wife truly does like boating. If she didn't, it most likely would have been more of a struggle to purchase it last fall. She just doesn't need to know that the boat (and it's associated upgrade possibilities) are the only thing you are thinking about right now. Just think about it for a second............would you want to hear about different types of makeup and what you can do with them every time you talk to your wife???? Heck no! LOL Most guys, including myself, can get really involved with our hobbies/activities. Whether it is cars, trucks, motorcycles, boats, and everything else. We love to customize them, do upgrades, and make them our own. We need to remember that our THINGS are not the only thing that matters. I went through a very similar situation two years ago.
You've flooded her with boat stuff, so just back off for a little while. Talk about and do things she likes to do. After a week or two you can talk to her about the boat again, I'm sure she likes/wants to hear a little about it. Just don't go too crazy. Yes, I know it is really easy to get obsessive about the boat. Things will work out, just take a break from talking with her about it.

Good luck

Shooter
04-21-2011, 12:45 AM
No wife.............no worries!!!

zabooda
04-21-2011, 02:11 AM
I had to deal with those issues but if you find something that she enjoys then it makes it fun. Try going out in the evening or when there are events in the area like the 4th of July from the boat. Some people don't care for the sun and the heat. I used to take my daughter camping and boating and we had a blast and I had a wife that appreciated that I did that. You can find the niche that works and it took me over 20 years of marriage to discover some of them.

KSmith
04-21-2011, 08:30 AM
My wife is great, fully supportive of the purchase of the boat. Almost tried to talk me into a Supra 21V, Damn it was nice, but for another 20 grand, not so much IMHO. She is supportive of upgrades and such to a point. Does get tired of hearing about them and at times gets cranky when she gets the bank statements ;-)

Now if I could get her to quit trying to run the trailer over when retrieving the boat we'd be good. There was a poor lake lice running for his life the last time out, she damn near backed over the poor bugger LOL. Of course she almost backed into the dock too... On the other hand the lice did park his arse right behind here knowing full well she was backing up (or trying to anyway). I made the dumb arse mistake of pushing her back off the trailer after her first successful, but poorly executed, effort at loading the boat onto the trailer. At the time there was no one around so I told her it was a good time to practice... my mistake, I should have quit when we were ahead...

sandm
04-21-2011, 08:33 AM
No wife.............no worries!!!

second that..

ex wasn't really on board with the idea at first, however liked the social aspect at the end(never did like water). gf absolutely loves the boat, and I think she's more anxious to surf than I am this year :)

kaneboats
04-21-2011, 09:54 AM
I agree you just have to cool the talk for a while and do a little more listening. How about trying to get her to go to a Moomba owners' get together so she can see other wives enjoying their boats?

Ian Brantford
04-21-2011, 09:56 AM
ex wasn't really on board with the idea at first, however liked the social aspect at the end(never did like water). gf absolutely loves the boat, and I think she's more anxious to surf than I am this year :)

I waited until someone broached the subject. This happens A LOT. I lurked on a general boating forum for years before coming here. There were many, many divorced people (mostly guys) there.

The common attitude there was "It's you and me and the boat or it's me and the boat". Many "first spouses" chose the latter.

mmandley
04-21-2011, 10:38 AM
I am Lucky Claudia is into the boat, she is not into like i am but she loves it.

I want to tell her all the ideas i have and such but as you talk and talk and talk about changes and upgrades and this and that all she hears is Cha Ching Cha Ching and that causes stress because of the money pit issue. Then she tells her GFs and they agree and they start this whole boat hate thing. Especially in the off season when money can be tight due to holiday and people are getting bummed the boat is sitting in the garage and you make payments on it and its not being used.

In the off season you gotta be careful how much Boat you throw into the lifes daily activity. In the summer its a lot easier to get away with it when the sun is hot and the water is cool and you can say Man wouldn't it be great to be on the boat today.

Just ease up on Boat talk in the off season, get into other things like the forums to talk about all your ideas and such. Thats what where hear for.

I know for me and Claudia its the friends we take that make the experience more fun, the ability for her to feel needed on the boat driving and such and for her to feel its ok to not be the best at something because we are all there to have fun.

skylar18
04-21-2011, 10:42 AM
I am very lucky. Wife loves the boat as much as I do, and being a teacher, takes it out on her own with the kids and their friends all summer long at least three times a week without me.

I actually am jealous. She is on it much more than me.

She wakeboards, surfs, skis, and has no problem with my "upgrades" to the boat or equipment. Pretty cool for someone in her early 40's.

She did think how much time I spend on the forums was a bit weird. However, she got a Camaro a few weeks ago and now she is on the Camaro Forums herself an hour or so each night, and told me now she understands!

Sea N' Things
04-21-2011, 10:47 AM
Not sure what advice I can offer but if you love your wife you have to listen! Maybe by her resisting the boat idea actually means spend more time with me first to talk about us. Women are complicated and you need the 8th sense of reading between the lines of the lines, meaning….always go deeper man. I don’t believe divorce is an option and to hide receipts is just not a good idea. if she ever finds out it will cause even more issues, not only will you have a wife that doesn’t like the boat but you will also have someone that doesn’t trust you, that’s not where you want to be. A boat is only a boat think of the commitment you guys made to each other first and fore most.

I challange you to be mind full of your wifes needs and when you come home say "honey how was your days today, what can I do to help you, would you like to talk for a while". Just make sure she FEELS more inportant than a boat, way more important! It wouldn't be long and you will be able to do what ever you want and you'll both be happy campers.... :)

sandm
04-21-2011, 11:14 AM
I waited until someone broached the subject. This happens A LOT. I lurked on a general boating forum for years before coming here. There were many, many divorced people (mostly guys) there.

The common attitude there was "It's you and me and the boat or it's me and the boat". Many "first spouses" chose the latter.

sure hope I didn't portray that opinion to you. there were many reasons for our divorce, none of which were the boat. simply making a statement that she didn't like it as much as me. she had her things, I had mine. she hated the 2 mitsu evo's that I owned much more than the boat :)

as with any relationship, if you have dissimilar interests, you should still listen to each other's hobbies/passions. doesn't mean you have to participate in them, but show an interest.

newty
04-21-2011, 12:58 PM
She'll adjust. Two trips are not enough to really let her get excited about the boat and all the possibilities. If shes anything like my wife she'll love the boat boat but because its winter/spring there is nothing to get excited about. Where you and I (all of us) get excited about all the cool stuff and how much we are going to love the new upgrades come summer and just want to talk about it!
My wife gets tired of me talking about it too. I've just learned to limit what I talk about. I do include her in decision making but trying to get her to be as excited as you about the newest goodies may be unrealistic. Although I'm confident she will appreciate all the upgrades and time spent come summer. Having kids excited about it really helps your cause, thats a good thing.
My .02 cents anyway.

c.rix
04-21-2011, 01:00 PM
I think if it weren't for my wife my moomba would be gone! ever since I picked it up I have had nothing but bad luck, Not bad luck with the moomba but with work 5 jobs in 3 years kinda bad luck... on top of it the 3rd time out behind my boat I totally blew my knee out has never been the same since. She is the one who pays for it and I take care of it so really if she says it stays I guess it stays

If I had my was I would probably have a fishing rig since 4-5 days a week I'm chasing muskies and maybe 2 on the moomba

kaneboats
04-21-2011, 01:06 PM
Mine got into the Moomba lifestyle after the first Atlanta Jam we attended a couple years ago, then the Tampa Jam right after that. She got sick of me manually filling ballast and really helped with the push for the LSV so we would have more room, less hassles and more fun. She loves going on the LSV but rarely gets in the water.

dusty2221
04-21-2011, 01:24 PM
My wife is amazing.


That is all.

:)

sailing217
04-21-2011, 02:03 PM
My wife and I are opposites so I understand how this thread started.

Make sure she has a hobby and support it as much as you want boating to be supported (I hate horses FWIW). Make sure the yardwork and house projects are done on rainy days.

My take was I can either go to the bar and have some beers with who knows, or be on the boat surfing/wakeboarding spending money on gas and you know who I'm with, sober too.

Have friends bring their wives and do an adult night on the boat where you just chillax, have some beverages, tan, listen to tunes. Wife doesn't like water, but does like to tan. The friends are the buddy system.

Wife now looks forward to adult-time on the boat. Family time I know if the kids are acting up, not to push my luck and get off the water asap, even if I don't get my run in. Gets better every season by doing the previous sentence.

E4NASH
04-21-2011, 02:14 PM
I feel you Dan. My wife is a nurse and works on the weekends. Which definitely sucks for us doing things together as a family but it does however give us the ability to do more things than we would otherwise as weekend nurses get paid quite a bit more.

She is definitely not as excited as I am about the boat and is not thrilled with my recent purchases of "necessities". Everything with boat in her opinion is "fine" or "nothing wrong with it the way it is". I, of course always see room for improvement and enhancement! Women!!

I do think that her mood will change once we get out on it together. I've been once so far and am probably not going to take it out again until she can go. That in itslelf is making me stir crazy! But I feel your pain brother...I hope things will take a turn once the season fully kicks in around here. We have scheduled several days off by either me during the week or her on the weekends around Holidays so we can get out on it together as much as possible. I will still go out with the buds and sometimes with the boys when they are not with their "wonderful" biological sperm donor, while she works but hey I work all day during the week and go to school at night I don't get to hang out at home for 4 days out of 7 like her! I feel like I have a right to do something on the weekends...am I wrong?

newty
04-21-2011, 04:54 PM
My wife's a nurse too! A nice second income fo sho!

E4NASH
04-21-2011, 05:16 PM
My wife's a nurse too! A nice second income fo sho!

No doubt! It sure helps out a lot. I hope I didn't come off bitter in my post. My wife is great woman and I love her to death. She "allowed" me to get the boat so she's pretty awesome in my book. She'll be more stoked about it all once we get out on it and when the kids get hooked then it will be 4 against 1!

WaterBullDawg1980
04-21-2011, 09:10 PM
Interesting thread. I was talking with my best friend about this the other day, and we both decided we would not know what to do if our wives did not love the boats.

Heather literally told me today, that all her stress would be gone (the girls were running her ragged that day) if I would "get her on the lake". Unfortunately I have been a mediocre husband and have spent my 85 degree weekends doing stuff around the house instead of putting the boat in the water. But I hope to have that remedied this Saturday!!

She loves the boat. She has always been the type that has liked spending time outdoors so it always kinda fit to be on the boat. But I do have hobbies that she doesn't really love, such as college football. :) What I have learned though, is that through the years I have been real patient with her, and tried not to overwhelm her with it. (Forcing her to watch and go to the games etc) And she has really come around. Where before she couldn't stand for it to be on, now she sits and watches all the Georgia games with me and shocks me every time with the knowledge she has picked up over the years.

Point is...give her time. Not that I am some expert in marriage, but a boat does so much more than most realize. The time my family gets to spend together on the lake bc of our boat is fantastic and makes the cost of ownership well worth it. I am sure once your wife sees these benefits she will come around and start being like some of our wives and nagging you to "get her on the lake":cool:

viking
04-21-2011, 10:17 PM
My wife is amazing.


That is all.

:)

Ditto on that! My wife stays at home to take care of our 3 little ones so she really allows me to do what's responsible with the money. Wasn't really excited about the boat idea initially a few years ago but really grown on her. I'm thinking a new Malibu Wakesetter would grow on her too :)

jmvotto
04-21-2011, 10:44 PM
My wife picked out our boat.. Nuf said.jk

She does think, this board is the " the other woman" sometimes,:rolleyes:

deafgoose
04-21-2011, 10:59 PM
My girlfriend of 11 years loves to wakeskate. She loves the boat just as much as I do.

I hit the jackpot.

Shooter
04-22-2011, 02:01 AM
I am very lucky. Wife loves the boat as much as I do, and being a teacher, takes it out on her own with the kids and their friends all summer long at least three times a week without me.

I actually am jealous. She is on it much more than me.



That is too cool. Reminds me of my SisInLaw. She started shooting a bow when my nephew was old enough to get his first. Now they are fortunate enough that she no longer has to work, and during hunting season my brother has to take the kids to school cause she is in a deerstand hunting 3-4 mornings a week. Then she'll get the kids from school and take them for evening hunts.

E4NASH
04-22-2011, 02:53 AM
Where does your wife work ? And the 4 to 1 odds can't be beat

St. Francis on Park. She is in L n' D...


... Where before she couldn't stand for it to be on, now she sits and watches all the Georgia games with me and shocks me every time with the knowledge she has picked up over the years...

Maybe the problem wasn't the college football, maybe it was the college football TEAM you were watching! Who would want to sit around and watch an underachieving Georgia team year after year? I know I wouldn't....Go Gators!!!!

Sorry I HAD to.... :D

rdlangston13
04-22-2011, 04:40 PM
My gf likes going out on the boat and camping. Our problem is it is hard to find guests to bring and some lakes require an observer in the boat. Since I work offshore 2 weeks on and 2 weeks off and she is a nurse and only works 3 days a week when I am off we have tons of time to go to the lake but it is not always on the weekend. I just bought us each a new board and rope yesterday so now we are all excited to get out on the water but we are out of town all weekend for a wedding so we will have to wait like a month to test out the new gear.

She does thing some of the upgrades I have planned are not necessary and has told me that I will never be on a joint account with her. But she did buy me my cwb ride surf board :-)

dusty2221
04-22-2011, 04:49 PM
FWIW, mine is at home "loading" the boat on hopes that when I get home in about 1.5 hours we can get to the water for the first outing before the rain hits tonight. Hopefully will able to get an hour or two in.

:)

WaterBullDawg1980
04-25-2011, 01:08 PM
Maybe the problem wasn't the college football, maybe it was the college football TEAM you were watching! Who would want to sit around and watch an underachieving Georgia team year after year? I know I wouldn't....Go Gators!!!!

Sorry I HAD to.... :D

I have no comeback. :(

The last two years have been brutal to watch. Can you believe that South Carolina of all teams is favored to win the SEC east?? The world is surely about to end.

E4NASH
04-25-2011, 01:19 PM
I have no comeback. :(

The last two years have been brutal to watch. Can you believe that South Carolina of all teams is favored to win the SEC east?? The world is surely about to end.

Agreed! However as long as its not the Hicks from Knoxville or the Gumps from Tuscaloosa I'm ok with it...I can handle an off year once-in-a-while...

Ian Brantford
04-26-2011, 12:01 AM
My gf likes going out on the boat and camping. Our problem is it is hard to find guests to bring and some lakes require an observer in the boat. Since I work offshore 2 weeks on and 2 weeks off and she is a nurse and only works 3 days a week when I am off we have tons of time to go to the lake but it is not always on the weekend.

Schoolteachers make good 3rds. In most districts, they have the summer off. :-) Firefighters also have unusual schedules they tend to be big bruisers who offer some extra ballast that's easy to reposition upon request in the boat.

rdlangston13
04-26-2011, 07:27 AM
Schoolteachers make good 3rds. In most districts, they have the summer off. :-) Firefighters also have unusual schedules they tend to be big bruisers who offer some extra ballast that's easy to reposition upon request in the boat.

Yeah the only problem is my gf thinks it's really weird when random people on the Internet forum join us on the boat lol. She thinks having online friends in general is extremely abnormal

kaneboats
04-26-2011, 12:05 PM
Not these days it's not. Where did you used to meet friends, in a bar? LOL!

Ian Brantford
04-26-2011, 12:59 PM
Yeah the only problem is my gf thinks it's really weird when random people on the Internet forum join us on the boat lol. She thinks having online friends in general is extremely abnormal

Huh? What? I did not say how to meet them! You'll just have to get out and socialise. Let people know that you and your GF are looking for a 3rd who is free on some weekdays. After you get done explaining that it's for the boat and not anything kinky, maybe your friends will help.

sandm
04-26-2011, 06:59 PM
man.. I met a lady named sue that I spent almost 40% of my surf time last year with her and her husband. great peeps and enjoyed every ride with them.. would not have happened if not for teh interwebz..
had several offers from peeps on here when I went to florida 2 years ago. wish I would have had another couple of days to meet some..

rdlangston13
04-26-2011, 07:51 PM
Not these days it's not. Where did you used to meet friends, in a bar? LOL!

that is where my girl and i met....

and i totally agree, especially if you move around alot for work, how are you supposed to meet people in the area? message boards are great for meeting people in your area with common interests.

skylar18
04-26-2011, 08:03 PM
Met my awesome wife at a frat party. She was drunk. Ended up with me.....that will teach her to drink to much!

skylar18
04-26-2011, 10:44 PM
What I meant to say was I met my wife the classic way, drunk at a party. I don't think I could survive in the dating world now with on-line dating, facebook statuses, and all these other things.