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Thread: Joke of the Day

  1. #201
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    Tallahassee, FL
    Posts
    11,297

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    A man was walking down the street when he was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking hobo who asked him for a couple of dollars for dinner.

    The man took out his wallet, extracted ten dollars and asked, "If I give you this money, you won't buy beer with it instead of dinner?"
    "No, I had to stop drinking years ago," the hobo replied.
    "Well, you won't do something crazy like spend the money on golf instead of food?" the man asked.
    "Are you NUTS!" replied the hobo. "I haven't played golf in 20 years!"
    "Well," said the man, "I'm not going to give you money. Instead, I'm going to take you home for a shower and a terrific dinner cooked by my wife."
    The hobo was astounded. "Won't your wife be furious for bringing me to your house?
    The man replied, "No worries. It's important for her to see what a man looks like after he has given up drinking and golf."
    My Mom said I'm not allowed to get wet!
    2008 LSV
    2000 Outback LS (sold)
    Exile Tunes
    PWI
    LLTR!!!!!!!!



  2. #202
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    Tallahassee, FL
    Posts
    11,297

    Default

    The Male Mind?????

    A husband went to police station to report his missing wife.

    Husband: I've lost my wife, she went shopping yesterday and has still not come home.

    Sergeant: What is her height?
    Husband: Oh, 5 something . .

    Sergeant: Build?
    Husband: Not slim, not really fat.

    Sergeant: Color of eyes?
    Husband: Uh, never noticed.

    Sergeant: Color of hair?
    Husband: Changes-- according to season, I think.

    Sergeant: What was she wearing?
    Husband: Dress/suit/blue jeans -- I don't remember exactly.

    Sergeant: Did she go in a car?
    Husband: Yes.

    Sergeant: What kind of car was it?
    Husband: 2015 Corvette Stingray 3LT with the Z51 Performance Package, shark gray metallic paint, with the 6.2 litre V8 engine with Direct Injection generating 460 HP. 8-speed paddle-shift automatic transmission, and GT bucket seats, and has a very thin scratch on the front left door.

    . . . . . . .
    My Mom said I'm not allowed to get wet!
    2008 LSV
    2000 Outback LS (sold)
    Exile Tunes
    PWI
    LLTR!!!!!!!!



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